These tiny perfect little people test our patience, make us tired night feeds yuck, make us suffer through endless amounts of Disney and Peppa Pig, refuse to eat their meals we lovingly prepared for them and the rest! All this adds up to very stressed parents. Who do we take it out on? Each other of course! We never argued before we had children. Bickered, yes. Never argued.
- I get up 4 times in the night one of which was an hour and he sleeps through it all. How can he sleep through a screaming baby and me occasionally kicking him in the shins. Then he continues to wake up in the morning and say ‘the baby slept well didn’t she’. Slept well? SLEPT WELL? Then I say ‘since she’s sleeping so well, can you take over this evening darling?’. The baby wakes twice for all of a minute. He moans he’s exhausted the next day.
- He goes to work. His days are always planned out for him. I sit at home thinking wtf am I going to do with them today? He escapes 90% of the tears apart from mine over the phone. Tee hee. I listen to both a baby who’s teething and irritable along with a toddler climbing everything and having a tantrum because he wants to climb out of the window and I selfishly won’t let him. He gets to listen to the radio. He also has a lunch break.
- I spend any spare time I can preparing dinner ready for when he walks through the door. He eats the dinner and comments on the amount of washing up. I had done 3 bundles of washing up before he got home. I have two children and two hands. Then we have a big dishwasher debate.
- He stumps his toe, throws himself on the floor screaming saying it’s the most painful thing ever. Yes it’s painful, sometimes I laugh at his comment or more him stumping his toe. Sometimes, I’m not in the mood and the glare says it all.
- He has OCD. As nice as it is to have everything organised and in it’s place. No, I can’t. It’s not nice. I can never find anything, he gets plenty of messages every. single. day. Asking where he’s put things and why TF HAVE YOU MOVED THEM AGAIN. We have incredibly high shelves in our kitchen and that’s where he chooses to put things I use. The things I use every day. Because they look good there. I would say no-one looks in our cupboards so they don’t need to look good, but people do. Because they look good. It’s a talking point.
- He leaves the toothpaste on the sink. We have a cup attached to the wall. That’s where it belongs.
- He shaves and leaves his beard in the sink. Not a big deal. But it is a big deal.
- Sometimes we argue about things, just because. Just because he’s been at work all day, I’ve been at home all day, we’ve run out of milk why didn’t he mention it last night in Tesco?
- If either has an evening out of the home, it turns into a big’ how dare they’. Evenings are the most difficult. Having fun while the other is spending hours calming the baby. Shit.
We argue about the most pointless things. I will be the first to admit I’m usually the instigator. I’m tired. It’ll never affect our relationship, we are both each others outlets. He’s a hero for putting up with me alone God love him.
If you’re looking for inspiration and ideas for an upcoming date night then take a look at different ideas and hopefully you’ll find the perfect date night. I recently wrote a post about How To Keep The Romance After Children and one of the ideas was to have a date night. Whether it’s weekly or once a month having one night, just the two of you, makes a huge difference in how well you stay connected as a couple. Children take up the majority of your time and conversations, so to set aside an evening for a date is a perfect way to keep the romance alive. No children around to interrupt your conversation with ‘choo choo, car, PEPPA!’ just the two of you enjoying each others company. Bliss!
- Bowling this is normally more fun when you go on a double date or in a group. This brings out Darrens competitive side. Anything brings out his competitive side. Bowling is great because I have a high chance of winning (in your face Darren). It’s a fun thing you can both enjoy and there’s no question there’ll be plenty of laughs during the night.
- Dinner in a restaurant, very fancy! Can you remember a meal in a restaurant where you haven’t had to bribe your dancing toddler off the table whilst over feeding your baby milk so she calms down? I can and it was days before I gave birth to my son. Call in the baby sitters and book a table at a restaurant you’ll both enjoy. It’s not often you both get to see each other ‘at your best’. Without a spot of baby sick on your shoulder, your toddlers dinner wiped down your leg, your hair in something other than a pony tail because your baby likes to pull large chunks out and him in his work clothes or some other kind of casual clothing. This used to be a regular outing before children and we really took it for granted. Now when we manage to dine out just the two of us it’s such a treat! We both make an effort and we both appreciate how good we can scrub up!
- Takeaway if you’re like us and your nearest babysitters aren’t really near, then a takeaway makes a great date night. You don’t need to dress up, you don’t need to stay up late, you can enjoy something really tasty while watching whatever you fancy on TV and it’s much cheaper than a restaurant meal. Sometimes there’s even some left for the next day (not in my house!).
- Weekend away why not turn your date night into a whole weekend! Our children aren’t quite old enough for me to be comfortable leaving them overnight but that’s just me. If you can take advantage of a weekend child free, then enjoy it! Having a weekend away without any responsibilities with you helps relieve any stress, you can enjoy as much as you can of adult activities, I don’t mean those kinds of activities, but a spa, sightseeing, anything you wouldn’t necessarily do if you had children with you. I’m looking forward to eventually having one of these weekends, maybe Barcelona again or if I’m not feeling brave enough to be in a different country to my children then somewhere in the UK will still be a fabulous treat.
- Bingo it’s not just for ladies and not just for ladies of a certain age. Bingo is so much fun, it’s not expensive and you could win a bunch! We’ve won a few times it’s an exciting feeling and if you’re not much of a talker then Bingo is perfect!
- DVD you could watch a DVD whilst you’re enjoying your takeaway or just spread out on the sofa once the children are in bed and watch a film that appeals to you both. When we both watch a film we tend to stick to comedy. I’d much rather watch something we can both laugh at than anything too intense. Although we are widening our DVD collection with things like ‘The Hobbit’.
- Cinema if you’d rather go out to enjoy a film then this way you don’t have to worry about your film being interrupted by a teething baby or a toddler who has just been woken up by the cat scratching his door. Treat yourself to as many sweet treats as you can. You don’t have to feel guilty about eating it in front of your toddler whilst handing him an apple!
- Concert chances are you’ll have a few artists that you both listen and bop your head too. So, if they have a concert coming up, put a little fund aside so you can both go, have a dance and listen to something other than that nursery rhymes cd you keep meaning to take out of the cd player. Even if you’re both into different kinds of music, any music live is an enjoyable experience and it’s good to try new things knowing it pleases your other half. You could also tie this in with a weekend away for a real splurge date night.
- Comedy show there’s nothing more therapeutic than having a belly-aching laugh so to enjoy this together is a bonus!
- Friends if you’ve not managed to catch up with friends lately because when you get any down-time you treat it as just that. Invite them over to you or travel over to them, you’ll both appreciate the adult conversation.
- Ghost tours it’s not for me as I’m a real wimp but it gives him the chance to be brave (he’s probably peeing his pants secretly) and it’s an experience that’s a bit different from the usual date night.
- Cooking together make yourself a really tasty three course meal. All you need to spend money on is the ingredients and this helps my man to learn a new meal to make should he ever need to. Pop on some music and have fun with it!
Have a good date night!